Over the years, I’ve immersed myself in countless personal growth books. In each of them, I’ve analyzed and reflected on what could be the most essential key to starting and unleashing that upward, positive spiral toward success and achieving life goals. If I had to choose just one piece of advice that encapsulates this process, it would be the following:
There’s an interesting discussion about what comes first: thoughts or emotions? After much research, I’ve concluded that thoughts come first. They are what generate our emotions and determine the actions we take. The best part is that we can work deeply on our thoughts to completely transform our lives.
But first, let me explain how this process works.
In response to a stimulus, whether external or internal, a thought is generated. These thoughts are often so fast and fleeting that we don’t even realize they’re happening, but they influence our decision-making: they push us to act or leave us paralyzed. Does that resonate with you?
The danger is that, by not being aware of these thoughts, we often let them control our lives. I call these invisible thoughts limiting beliefs. They are beliefs that, formed throughout our personal history, limit us from achieving our goals.
One of the most common limiting beliefs in our society is the feeling of “not being enough.” This belief, which many people carry silently, causes low self-esteem, stress, stagnation, and, in some cases, even depression. It stops us from taking on new challenges, such as starting a healthy relationship, seeking a new job, or stepping out of our comfort zone.
However, when we recognize that limiting belief and accept it, we have the opportunity to manage and transform it. On the other hand, if we don’t accept it, it will continue to control us from behind the scenes.
Working on our beliefs and thoughts is what, in my opinion, unleashes that positive spiral toward success. Changing limiting thoughts for empowering ones pushes us to reach our deepest dreams.
How can we transform our negative thoughts?
1- Recognize them with humility and acceptance.
If we don’t accept that we have them, they control us; if we accept them, we can change them.
- Examples of limiting beliefs: “I’m not good enough for…” or “I don’t deserve love.”
2- Understand what role that belief is playing.
Ask yourself: what is this belief protecting me from? For example, “I’m not enough to apply for a new job” might be protecting you from the fear of failure or embarrassment. The problem is that, in many cases, these beliefs extend far beyond one action and end up limiting many areas of your life.
3- Two effective and complementary options for change:
Option 1:
Ask yourself sincerely: is it true that I’m not enough? With this question, you can validate or invalidate the belief. Then ask yourself: what can I do to be more than enough? How can I prepare? And, of course, act accordingly.
Option 2:
Repeat positive affirmations throughout the day, such as “I am enough” or “I can.” Place phrases in visible places that remind you of your worth. Look at yourself in the mirror and say: “I am more than enough,” and repeat it until you start to believe it.
4- Start acting “as if.”
Act “as if” you were already enough, “as if” you could already do it. This simple shift will lead you to believe in your abilities, and over time, you will prove to yourself that you truly are capable.
Here’s a small exercise for you: think about a moment when you had to make a decision but didn’t feel enough. Notice how that affected you emotionally. Now, imagine that in that same moment, you felt completely capable and confident in yourself. How does your body change? How do you feel? This exercise will show you how your thoughts directly influence your emotions and, consequently, your actions.
When our emotions are positively aligned with our thoughts, we act with greater effectiveness and confidence, increasing our chances of achieving what we desire in life.